Word of the Day: deucedly

I was placed in a deucedly awkward position when my pig Percival presented me with a list of all the horrible things I was doing to the earth by driving my brand new pre-shrunk Hummer around town along with a list of signatures from concerned citizens who wanted me to stop using the dieseling behemoth to drive the thirteen feet from my front door to the mailbox at the end of the driveway.

Word of the Day: persnickety

Due to all of the discussions about the SOPA and PIPA bills in congress, my pig Percival spent a lot of time thinking about the persnickety problem of internet piracy today and came to the conclusion that the only solution to the problem is to build hyper-creative robots which will emotionlessly create all books, music, movies and television shows for free, with all of their plots and themes being about pigs (and occasionally, horses), thereby making piracy a thing of the past and freeing us from the tyranny of money-hungry executives from Hollywood.

Word of the Day: alate

Out in the backyard, far beyond the rumbling diesel noises of my brand new, pre-shrunk Hummer, you will find the entrance to my pig Percival’s beautiful, organic garden and perched high above the golden archway that marks the opening to the garden you will find a sculpture of a pig adorned with giant, widespread wings stretched over the entrance like a golden, alate protector of all that is good and edible in the universe.

Word of the Day: desinence

I thought my pig Percival would be more upset when his publishing deal ended after just thirteen books, but he looked at it as something inevitable- a part of life- and said that the desinence would not be the ending of his wordsmithing, but the beginning of a new chapter in his life.

Word of the Day: heterotelic

My pig, Percival, has done so many things to improve the life of others throughout his years that it is now becoming clear to me that his existence on this plane is of heterotelic value because I am sure the greatness of his deeds will never be fully known or understood, even by me.

Word of the Day: copacetic

My pig Percival had thought everything was copacetic until all of a sudden, to his surprise, out of the clear, blue skies, he started receiving complaints from customers about the newest flavor of his Famous Corn and Beer stew – fresh watermelon - which, apparently, wasn’t going over as well as he’d hoped it would.

Word of the Day: irrefragable

It is an irrefragable fact that my pig Percival is a fan of Truffle Spice Lattes and if you don’t believe me, just look at the giant sculpture of pigs drinking lattes he constructed in the backyard out of the 13,013 used coffee cups he brought home from Swinebucks.

Word of the Day: punctilious

Ever since he learned that I cannot remember all of the names of the kids in my elementary school class pictures, my pig Percival has become extremely punctilious with respect to his labeling of the names of all of the piggies in his school pictures, even making sure to acknowledge the one who cries “Wee Wee” all the way home from school every day.